My Joshua lived a bright life, with so much sparkling promise.
Sudden and unexpected losses are a tortuous jolt that leaves painful blisters on your heart…leaving you, in life, not getting to say everything you didn’t get to say and still want and need to say.
I found myself one day carrying this beautiful backpack of love. It is stitched with extraordinary detail and every fiber woven strong, keeping it together forever. I can’t ever seem to take it off because it is so heart fulfilling and comforting. I keep feeling it getting thicker and heavier from everything that is being contained inside, along with what is constantly being added inside the backpack.
I realized this backpack I am carrying every day is filled with countless and endless words, emotions, and memories that I never got or get to release out of the bag into Joshua’s heart and life.
My bag has encountered some battering and bruising; and is starting to become rough and rugged…but I carry it with me at all times, no matter where I go. I will never take this priceless backpack off because I never ever want what’s inside to get lost. No matter how thick or heavy this backpack gets, I will always know every piece that is inside. I will carry this beautiful and priceless backpack of love with me until I enter into Heaven…and then there…when I get to see my precious, signature son…I will completely get to empty out everything that is being stored inside from every single day I spent on earth without him.
And at that precise moment in my life…when I get to empty my beautiful backpack of love unto my Joshua….that moment of time in my heart will be joy uncontainable.